#PreOrder #GuestPost – “Middle Ageish” by Shirley Goldberg

Many thanks to Amber Daulton for hosting me on her lovely blog.

I2527m a newbie author, so squeaky new my book isn2527t even out yet. Ten more days to go. August 26 is the release date.

So why a book about a woman who starts over, moves from Paris, France to New Haven, CT, goes back to school, and online dates?

My friends asked the same question. Since the book2527s heroine, Sunny Chanel, is online dating, they sneak in a few questions when we2527re enjoying a virtual happy hour. “How much is autobiographical?” “Was that a true story about the 300-pound man Sunny dated?” “Did you really go on six meets in one week?”

Sure, there2527s a bit of me in Middle Ageish, but making fiction, and turning experience into a belly laugh is much more fun than humans should have. And I2527m having the time of my life, pumping my checkered past for “copy” as Nora Ephron (or was it her mother?) calls everything that2527s story material. From a trip to Walmart where an old guy mistakes your shopping cart for his (Subtract twenty years and turn that into a Meet Cute scene?) to an online meet with a guy who2527s got the sort of beard that catches in his zipper, my mind clicks and grinds, always on the chase for a story.

And, yes, I used to hide my pocket journal in my overlarge (for a date) handbag and scribble notes in the ladies2527 room midway through a date. Isn2527t that why someone invented that cliché, the devil2527s in the details? I sat through dozens of first-meets where guys talked about themselves for forty-five minutes straight and never asked me any questions, or somehow thought I2527d be googly-eyed with mirth at their date-from-hell stories.

So when I wrote about Sunny sneaking off to the restroom to jot down thoughts during her dates, well, yes, I did do that. Sometimes, I2527d even call a friend for advice. From the toilet, I2527m admitting it. Let2527s call him Peter, and say he2527s got world-class experience in the dating department. He2527s real and he2527s on my website.

And I still have that little packed-with-memories journal. 

Shirley Goldberg
Middle Ageish/Romantic Women2527s Fiction

Middle Ageish Blurb

Sunny Chanel’s marriage is circling the drain when her husband marks his colonoscopy on the calendar and ignores their anniversary. With divorce papers instead of roses on the horizon, she says “au revoir” Paris and croissants, and “hello” cheap New Haven apartment and ramen noodles.
Encouraged by her friends, Sunny jumps into online dating, twenty-three years and twenty pounds after her last date. To her surprise she discovers dating might require a helmet, and occasionally armor to protect her heart, but after years of being ignored, her adventurous side craves fun and conversation. She’s middle-aged not dead. Then suddenly, on the way to reinventing herself, life takes a left turn when the one man she can’t forget calls with an unexpected request. 

Excerpt from Middle Ageish

I slouched at my computer and peered at the screen. The letsclick.com dating site was becoming my best friend. 

The first email in the lineup was from Luke. Soulmate Guy, I called him, because he was the first who2527d talked about the soulmate thing—even though there were 7,000 other guys online clamoring for a soulmate.

Cute, too, with Jeff Bridges hair. Jeff still had hair, didn2527t he?

A popcorn sound startled me––newbie dater that I was––and a cartoon bubble appeared on the screen with Luke2527s image. Would you like to chat with Luke?

Well, that was a dumb question. I hit the yes button. Yes, yes I would. Chat was the site2527s version of texting and this was my first time.

—Luke: Hey, got a few minutes? This messaging is friendlier than old school emails. How goes it? Back from vacation. Went to the island. So different there in the winter. Beautiful in a different way. Just came home from doing a little bar dancing. I stayed about an hour. Every once in a while, I do that on a tense night. This was my tense night.

—Sunny: Tense, shmense. What2527s wrong?

—Luke: One of those old girlfriend things. We have a lot in common—biking, riding, skiing, and some total madness thrown in, but she doesn2527t give me space. It2527s complicated.

— Sunny: What2527s with the old girlfriend thing? If you2527ll be so kind as to be my dating mentor, I have a question. Dating mentor, is it wise to redate old girl/boy friends?

—Luke: Absolutely not, are you nuts? My prob is I don2527t like being alone. I like sharing things with someone.

—Sunny: So what is it you look for in a woman? Really, I2527m not fooling around here.

—Luke: I know you2527re not. I2527m taking your question seriously. Well, I2527m past craving the 30 year olds with zero body fat and total flawless skin. That is a truly good thing since I2527m 54 and they wouldn2527t want me anyhow. But our bodies are important, the only one we have, so I can2527t pretend I don2527t care about the shape a woman is in. I like smiles, legs, arms, necks. You get the picture. Oh, can2527t forget that erotic zone called the mind. That2527s most of it.

—Sunny: Wow!

—Luke: I can2527t stand it anymore. I2527m signing off here so I can call you. Give me your phone number. Please. Now—

About the Author 

Shirley Goldberg is a writer, novelist, and former ESL and French teacher who2527s lived in Paris, Crete, and Casablanca. She writes about men and women of a certain age starting over. Her website http://midagedating.com offers a humorous look into dating in mid life, and her friends like to guess which stories are true. Middle Ageish is her first book in the series Starting Over. Her character believes you should never leave home without your sense of humor and Shirley agrees.

MY SOCIALS:

https://twitter.com/mylifeasadate
https://www.facebook.com/midagedating
https://www.instagram.com/shirleygoldbergauthor/

Visit my website for another excerpt from the book and grab a copy of Happy Hour, a short story about an online meet and a misunderstanding. https://midagedating.com/